Those of you that know me know that I love Taylor Swift more than I love most humans.
Sooo...
Evermore.
Yeah, this song undid me the first time I heard it in November 2020.
Gray November
I've been down since July
Motion capture
Put me in a bad light
I spent all of 2020 being scared of dying, being scared of leaving my girls...just being scared.
And very down.
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| Yes, I look old and half dead. I was, so... |
The only thing that kept me sane was my weekly chats with my friends.
Ugly Sweater, Christmas, New Years...Random Saturday nights.
You guys kept me sane.
Okay, you also kept me ugly and fat -- haha!! Oh, wait, that was just me.
Those calls and our silly group chats kept me grounded. Reminded me that I was not totally alone in my inability to completely wrap my head around our 'new normal'. (ISTG, I loathe that phrase even though I catch myself using it all the time!)
Hey December
Guess I'm feeling unmoored
Except I wasn't exactly unmoored, because I had the best humans ever giving me a safe berth whenever I needed one.
Thank you guys for that.
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| Ugly Sweater 2020, starring my chins! |
I hope you get that, I hope you know how important you all were to me. I mean, you still are, obvs, but between trying to negotiate my own fear, work, Roo's (lord have mercy) "schooling" and her isolation, me missing the Twin Terrors and all the other littles....Ya'll saved me.
Getting my ass (and chins) kicked in the best way.
The 'Holiday Season" was absolutely saved by being able to connect with my friends in that way. My heart was saved a bit too, as well as the few vestiges of sanity (ha!) that I have been able to carry with me through the years.
In 2021, we stopped the calls, and them some friends moved away.
2nd to last or very last call with all of us. :(
Anyway, we planned a road trip to see those friends in 2021, the first non-family, non-kid, no obligation, all-for-fun friend trip I have had in my entire life,
I hung onto the thought of that trip through weeks -- through weeks of absolutely insane Tinder dates, through shitty work days, through all of it,
I could not wait.
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| Road Dawgs planning 'waxxed and vaxxed 2021' road trip! <3 |
Our trip started with some hitches, but once we were on the road, it was salami, nuts, me mooing at cows and shrieking at crows and tap-dancing in the back of Sisu - the best Jeep there ever was.
C and D and I sang, laughed, and talked our way through Washington, Oregon, and half of California.
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| Why, thank you! |
It was gorgeous. If I could have recorded us to save us for the rest of my life, I would have.
Instead, all I have are the memories of those hours of us laughing and trashing and car-dancing.
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| Glorious Mt. Shasta |
Plus, there was that amazing rest stop in Shasta where we stopped to smell the roses (there is literally a spot for you to do that there! - and let I had to take my shoes off and walk in the CA dirt and yank some pine needles out of trees just to have.
To be continued....
Spoiler - we had the most fun ever.
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| On Mill Plain, ready to head South!! |
To be certain we'll be tall again
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