What Kind of Person Attracts You?
I totally just went through this. It sucked. |
Oh, this is TOO EASY!!!!
Shortest. Blog. Evaaah!!
People's Exhibit A. |
Exhibit B. |
*sigh* |
There you go, folks...everything that attracts me to a person in 3 easy pieces...
Okay, in all seriousness, looks are actually not what attracts me to people. Real people, anyway. Those dudes up there are not real people, so they don't count.
What really attracts me to people - male, female, whatever - is intelligence. That's right, ya'll, BRAINS! They matter. You are probably saying to yourself, "Well, she's just saying that because she is not attractive, and she is hoping some hot dude will read this and be all, 'Oh, Mary, you're so smart, let's date even though I am way hotter than you'". If you really think that, please stop reading this blog - right this instant - and go get yourself sterilized. Please.
Seriously, I cannot abide dumb people. I won't date dumb people, although I have before, to quite disastrous results, I can't spend too much time hanging out with dumb friends, and if my kids were dumb, well...they would have to go, too. Seriously. (By the way, if you are thinking that I am a bitch for saying this, and you are thinking about leaving a comment about developmentally disabled people and how non-PC this all is, stop reading now. Leave. You are too dumb for this blog).
Leave NOW. The brain has spoken. |
If I go to a person's house, and they don't have any books--or even some magazines, our friendship probably isn't going to be a close one. Unless they look like those guys up there ^^, in which case it may be close, but not for very long.
Sarcasm, irony, wit, intelligence...those are all qualities that attract me to people. Good spelling helps as well. However, the damn Internet has broken me down; I no longer even try to bother correcting when people misuse 'to, too, two', or when someone uses 'loose' when they mean 'lose' (wait, does that make them a 'looser', because that is an insult I can actually approve of - gonna start using that one immediately!). And don't even GET me started on the your/you're thing.... I used to be one of the people that pulled this kinda shit on Facebook:
Dumb Friend: You know your stupid if you're friends are smarter then you
A*Hole Mary: *you're stupid/ *your friends/ *than :)
I don't do that anymore...the sea of stupid has overwhelmed me, and I no longer care about people talking about buying their boyfriend P. Diddy's colon for Christmas, or praying for angles to watch over them at their job interview....I have more important things to do on the internet-- like find pictures of Ryan Gosling for this blog.
The same goes for females by the way....all of my close female friends are witty and funny and have the ability to complete a crossword puzzle without using a thesaurus! When I get around dumb broads that want to talk about reality TV or can only discuss boyfriend/husband stuff, I want to rip my own head off and throw it at their faces. A little harsh, right? Sorry I'm not sorry, ya'll.
So, that's about it. This post was super easy, super fun to write, and required no soul-searching at all...I love it!!
NOTE: I just re-read this whole thing, and I sound a little lezzery I think...maybe? Did I? I don't know, you can tell me. I am totally not a lesbian, but the damn thing said "What attracts you to a person", not specifically a partner or whatever, so I tried to make it universal. However, if you do think I am gay, I really don't care because of this:
Hottest Woman Alive |
(that previous sentence is jacked on purpose, but it's bothering me!! let's see how long I can leave it up!)
Cheers.
7 comments:
Oh miss mary you crack me up! I just hope I'm one of ( your) smart friends!
You totally fit the funky glasses wearing hot librarian chick, looking over your glasses with mystique ?
Oh, you're attracted to sarcasm?? Awesome, and.....how YOU doin'? The hell is wrong with a thesaurus?? You don't find someone taking the initiative to learn something new attractive? We need to hug this out, sister.....
Always, bug! You get my jokes, so you are in!
Ah, you men and the hot librarian look..... ;)
Okay, you got me there! Initiative is a sign of intelligence, and therefore you and your thesaurus-wielding are ok! ;)
Can't say I'm too book smart but definitely a smart ass and plus the length of fiends hip has to count for something. :)
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